Common Reasons Assuming both you and your ex-spouse are a loving, dedicated part of your child’s life, it will be hard on both of you for a child to decide they don’t want to see one of you. In the chaos and confusion of a divorce, there could be several reasons for this behavior: Guilt Your child may feel uncomfortable leaving one parent for the other, feeling that they are leaving one of you alone and lonely. At the time of exchange these feelings may be heightened. Make sure your child knows that while you will miss him or her, you won’t be lonely or sad when they go to their other parent. Need for Familiarity Particularly if your house is the child’s primary residence, being uprooted even for scheduled visits can be disruptive, and they may prefer to stay where things are most familiar and settled. Try to work out elements that make them most comfortable and transport or replicate those items or aspects at their other home. Avoiding Messages You children should never be asked to pass on messages or sentiments, either directly or indirectly, and both parents should do all you can to honor your child-parent relationship as you did before the divorce. Even if the information is about a school trip, additional expenses, or otherwise directly related to them, discuss the details with your co-parent yourself. Do what’s best for your child if he or she decides they don’t want to go to their other parent’s house. Seek counseling and have conversations with your child and your ex-spouse. Try to get to the bottom of why your child is resisting time with the other parent and do what you can to work through it. Modifying the Parenting Agreement If the avoidances persists and issues arise to indicate that it is in the best interest of your child to reduce the amount of time that is spent with their other parent, then you can seek a modified parenting plan. The first step is to file a petition with the court to modify the parenting plan. Depending on the age of the children, they may be interviewed through conciliation services. Any issues will be reported to the Court, which will then take all factors into account and respond to your petition. When you have children, a divorce is not the end of your relationship with your ex-spouse. If you need advice or assistance dealing with matters such as modifying parenting plans, contact Simon Law Group for a thorough assessment and counsel.]]>
